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Adoption FAQs
Adoption today is very different than it was when you were growing up. Today when a woman decides to place her child for adoption she gets to be in charge of the process. If you decide to work with an adoption agency, the agency will help you understand your options and help you to make a plan. Below are some of the most frequently asked questions about adoption.
Frequently asked questions
No. Our counsellors will spend as much time as you need to review your options and help you get the information you need to make the choices that are right for you. If you decide not to plan an adoption, we will refer you to resources and organizations, which can assist you. We can put you in touch with birth mothers who have placed a child for adoption, or birth mothers who have chosen to parent their children, who would be available to talk with you.
The answer is absolutely Yes. Our office is located in North Vancouver and you are welcome to come in and have a meeting in our office anytime. We also have the availability to come to you so one of our counsellors can meet with you in your area in your community in any location that you are comfortable with.
Some birth fathers are involved in the adoption planning, some are not, and some in fact wish to parent. Whatever the situation, we can help. While it is ideal if the birth father is involved and supporting you in your adoption plan, that is not always the case. However, if he is involved, we can offer counselling support, and provide information regarding a birth father's legal rights.
If the birth father is not supportive of an adoption plan, you can talk to your counsellor about the implications, options and decision-making for the best possible outcome for the baby. Even when the birth father is not involved you can provide any known medical and social information, to preserve for the child.
The answer is any time, really. We work with women at all different stages of their pregnancy as early as confirmation of the pregnancy all the way up to being called after the child has been born. We will work with you at any stage of your decision making process to help you look at your options and make the best plan for you and your baby.
The counsellors at Sunrise will provide you with the profiles of prospective adoptive families, for your review. In many cases, birth parents will select a few families that they are drawn to; Sunrise will then give you the homestudy packages of the families you are interested in knowing more about. After you have reviewed the homestudies and profile information, and have selected a family who is the right match for you, your counsellor will contact the family to discuss the potential for placement. You will likely meet the family you choose before the baby is born, at a meeting arranged by your counsellor. It is only after this meeting that you confirm that this is the right family for you.
You will complete a social and medical history which we will share with the adoptive family. Sunrise will not release any identifying information you have provided to us, such as a last name or contact information. However, once you meet the family, you can share as much information as you feel appropriate.
Once you begin working with us you will get to read a homestudy report on as many different families as you would like. That report is actually an assessment completed by a social worker that includes several background checks as well as a full education program that they complete with the agency. Please see the video for the full answer.
After the initial meeting with the family, you can discuss how much contact you would like before the baby is born. Where you meet and the amount of contact you have with the adopting family is up to you. You can also discuss the kind of openness you will have after the adoption.
You will work with your counsellor to develop a birth plan, including: whether or not the adoptive family will be with you during the birth, who will care for baby in hospital, how long you would like to spend with the baby before you sign the consents to adoption, when the baby will go home with the adopting parents, how the placement of the baby with the adopting parents will occur, and any plans that are important to you.
The literature about open adoption is overwhelmingly positive about the benefits of openness, not only for the child, but the birth parents and adopting family. Openness takes a commitment to relationship building, by the birth-parents and adopting parents, but the outcome is incredibly positive for the child, who will benefit from loving relationships with many people.
Usually a hospital-stay or birth plan is in place before you deliver. However, your wishes may change when the time arrives. This is often a very emotional time and you may need more time and support than you initially anticipated. Your counsellor will be on hand to ensure your experience is what you want.
Some moms tell us that they are worried that if they make an adoption plan, their friends will think they are being a bad mom. What is the right decision for one person, is not the right choice for another. Only you can make the right choice for you and your baby. You are not a bad mom if you choose to place your baby for adoption. Making an adoption plan is a very selfless choice. You may be making this choice because you feel that you are unable to parent at this time in your life. That means you are putting your baby’s needs first.
If you decide to place your child for adoption, you will be making a very hard choice for you. You will also be giving a couple the opportunity to become a family. There are many couples who are not able to have children and really want to have the chance to be parents.
Sunrise offers post-placement counselling and facilitates a support group in Vancouver that is available once a month. Our counsellors can provide you with one on one counselling in person, or over the telephone. You are invited to participate in or attend any agency events, such as our birth-parent information panels which occur three times a year.
